Bossy Summit

8 of the 16 bossy offspring

We are here working hard to make our blog better for you.

Mommy's Boot Camp

You may have heard me talk about Mommy Boot Camp. I realize that this sounds like a boot camp for moms, and in a way it is. Perhaps more accurately it would be called Mommy's Boot Camp, as in: I'm the mom, you'll do things my way. But I like to say it better without the 's'.

All of us here at Bossy are having a BOSSY SUMMIT this week/weekend in sunny Cal-i-forn-i-ay. That means out of the last 8 weeks, my children have only been home for 2. That also means sleep schedules are off, bad habits are forming, little people everywhere are feeling entitled and wondering if a new day has dawned in the land of kids-are-in-charge.

But I do not fear. For I hold the power, the mighty power of Mommy Boot Camp. Enrollment begins the morning after we get home.

There are certain times in my parenting life when I've had to impose Mommy Boot Camp. The most obvious are 1) sleep training, 2) returning from travelling and getting back into routine (obeying house rules). Other times might include breaking bad habits, usually falling into one of the two categories already mentioned.

When we get home from vacation, I gear myself up for Mommy Boot Camp. This means that I have to be ready for it as well--no lingering in front of the computer getting caught up on blogs and emails, no trying to squeeze in just a few more minutes of sleep in the morning when the kids are hollering and doing who-knows-what in the family room.

You could also call it the Mommy Smack Down. It works best if your spouse leaves early for work before it gets ugly. You will get dressed before you eat your breakfast. You will go to bed at the early hour. You will eat your veggies, and, NO MORE "SPECIAL TREATS".

I am going to just enjoy these next few days and not worry about whether teeth get brushed or all that was eaten was junk food. Because I know. I know how to correct all these miserable little ones.

Welcome Home. Welcome to Mommy Boot Camp.

Isn't this a funny/strange photo? I was looking for a crying baby image, but decided to use this instead. :)

'Twas the night before houseguests

'Twas the night before houseguests and all through my house
Not a thing was quite ready, not even my spouse.
The towels were hung in the bathroom with care,
In hopes that our guests would not see the mess there.

The children are nestled all snug in MY bed,
While dread of sleep deprivation dances in my head!
You see, me in my slippers and Jason trav’ling Texas
Had just gotten used to a house without houseguests.

When out on the internet there arose such a clatter
I sprang to my desk to see what was the matter
When, what to my web-surfing eyes should appear,

But a birthday invite! How I hope they’ll stay here!

With 5 sweet children, so precious and good,

I just cannot wait to see M’lissa and David.

More rapid than eagles Emily and kids came,

And have kept me company and kept me sane.

"Now, Mom! now, Robin! now, Kristen and kids!

I love you so much! But there’s no more room in the inn.

To the Crowne Plaza Hotel! It is right by the mall!

Now hurry up! Come right now! Dash away all!"

As siblings that live far apart, far and wide,

When their grandma turns 90, they mount to the sky,

So up with Southwest, United and Delta they flew,

With their arms full of kid’s gear, and lots of love too.

And now, in a twinkling, I've realized right quick

That my family won’t judge me if things aren’t perfect.

We are coming together to celebrate and do
Our grandma’s 90th birthday! And Jane’s baptism, too!

This is the t-shirt logo for our Grandma's birthday. Ninety is the new forty.

We haven’t all been together for years...
Thinking of that puts me almost in tears.
I care not if my house is just perfectly right;
My heart swells to think of the beautiful sight:

Of our family, together. How lucky are we!
To be a happy, loving, eternal family.

STILL, all will be gathered here for days on end
And I have plenty of things to mend.
The kids’ toys, their closets and more are a mess!
We all will work hard and just do our best.

My pantry is stocked with chocolate and junk food
And not to be bossy or demanding or rude,
But a job chart is hung on the fridge with great care
In hopes that I won’t be pulling out my hair!

In truth, I can’t wait to see my sweet fam’ly
With their kind faces and warm love for me.
They are witty and smart, a right jolly old crew
And we never run out of fun things to do.

Remembering this and all else that I’ve said,
Helps me to know I have nothing to dread;
Now I’ll websurf no more, but go straight to my work,
And clean up this house; with a smile as a perk,

This is always what I look like when I do housework. Always.

And setting my alarm as early as it can,

I’ll awake to continue my housecleaning plan;

Such that when all arrive I’ll feel cheerful, not weepy

But I think most of all I’ll be feeling quite sleepy.

So they’ll hear me exclaim, ere I run out of sight,

"Welcome to all! And to all a good night!"

......................................................................................................................................

The real story: I love having houseguests. Robin the Wonderful has planned a party for our Grandma's 90th birthday (I hope she will blog about it), and every member of our family will be here for it! When I found out that everyone would be able to come, I invited (begged) those that live furthest away and have the youngest/most kids to stay with me. We will be in cousin heaven here and I can't wait.

Helping Myself

Remember when Sally shared her New Year resolution to try to live her life as if she were 20 years older and suddenly had the chance to go back and do it all again? I have been thinking about that so much. Fifteen years ago I was 30 and if I could go back and visit myself, we would sit on that old couch that gets the afternoon sun while the kids napped, and this is what I would tell myself:

• Quit worrying about what people will think. They aren’t thinking about you.

• Buying things won’t make you happy. Doing things will. Instead of buying stuff – do stuff.

• Impressive cars and fancy houses don’t make you impressive or fancy. And they won’t make people like you (see #1)

• Invite people over more. Quit worrying about if they like you (they do) or if your house is clean enough (they don’t care – see #1).

• Pray more. Pray about EVERYTHING. Like: Should we buy a car? Should I home school? How can I help my child? What can I do for my husband? Please help me to stop freaking out!
• 
  
• Back WAY off the sugar. You’ll feel better. And, while you’re at it, enjoy how darling and skinny you are right now. Start appreciating how beautiful you are – you are much too hard on yourself.
  

Then after I gave all that advice I would tell myself just how great I was. I would point out all the things I was doing right. Then we, my 30 year old self and I, would wake the kids up from their naps and cuddle while we read books, then we would go play in the garden - pushing the kids on the swings and admiring their daring trampoline tricks.

I wouldn’t be able to stay long. I am needed here in my 44 year old life. I would probably cry when it was time to go because I miss that time when my kids were all mine and hadn’t found the world yet.

I would hug my 30 year old self and tell her I love her. I really do love her. And then I would tell her one last thing:

You are better than you think you are.

Worst First Date

This is probably the funniest date story ever, first date or not!!! We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake. (Thanks mom, for emailing this to me!)

Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was midwinter...Snowing and quite cold... and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City , Utah. It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a restroom and in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.

They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem, due to the extreme cold. Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about 'what is taking so long' with a reply that indeed, she was 'freezing her butt off' and in need of some assistance!

He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be 'pants down'.

'And you thought your first date was embarrassing' was Jay Leno's comment... 'This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed off. Oh and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was sitting next to her on the Leno show.

What was your worst first date?

________ Makes Me Happy.

by Emily

Well, it ain't the cold weather.

It makes me down right grumpy, morose, cranky, yea even cantankerous, ill-humored, gloomy, dyspeptic, irritable, slothful, acrimonious even. Essentially it renders me useless and unpleasant to be around. Be warned. Here's a photo just in case you need a visual of the passive irritated rage expressed on my face while I make dinner and my husband dares to document our happy family life with our new camera.This photo was NOT staged.

Now, try to scroll past that unpleasant image greeting you for today's post. Let us speak of agreeable, congenial things, for all you happy bunnies out in winterland.

_______ Makes Me Happy

1. The yellow rose that DW gave Ruby 2 weeks ago and is still colorful, though a bit crusty, on our table top in a Perrier bottle that Joe bought because he wanted to drink something that made him feel special and our choices are limited since we don't drink alcohol. Thank you crusty but bright yellow rose. Thank you DW. Thank you Joe for green glass bottles. Thank you Ruby for being you that someone would want to give you a yellow rose.

2. SFLB (Short in the Front, Long in the Back); Business in Front, Party in the Back; Make Mom Happy but Still be Cool; Mullets. Okay, maybe I'm aiming at the wrong thing. Here: my little toddling crawler whose bangs I cut too short and whose curls I can't bear to cut, because he's my baby, dangit! And I'm not going through all that again anytime soon so he better stay baby for a long while. Do you think it would be cruel for me to go wake him up right now (it's 10 pm) just so I could selfishly slobber on his soft cheek and tickle him to hear his laugh? This is the best medicine. A drug, really. I'm totally addicted. It actually makes my mouth water (my eyes, too, in a different sort of way).

3. Double Stuffed Mint Oreos, Black Cherry Chocolate Chunk Ice Cream, Creamy Chicken Soup, and Tortilla Soup. In other words: Joe. Because this is the odd assortment of food he bought at the store on his recent "milk run" in a loving effort to cheer me up. Did I mention that I hate this cold weather? So, for the obvious: It's not the food that cheers me, but a husband who is so devoted and kindhearted. And funny. He even makes me laugh when I'm determined not to. (Like after he took that sneaky photo of me unawares and pissed off.)

This is my favorite toy in the way it promotes playing together and results in gleeful laughter. Music to my ears.

Welcome, President Obama

by Sally

Tomorrow is the Inauguration of the next President of the United States. I am happy that Barack Obama will be our President. I believe that he is intelligent, thoughtful, deliberate, and will surround himself by smart advisors who will challenge and improve his thinking. I know he will reach out to the right and work to bridge the widening gap between conservatives and liberals. I worry about the state of our economy, our involvement in conflict around the world, and the diminishing moral standards of popular culture, but I think President Obama will be a good leader through these challenges.

I plan to use the Inauguration as an opportunity to teach my children more about the Federal government's structure and the demands of the Presidency. We will have a family night tonight with a short lesson about President Obama and his family, and what his job will be. We'll also talk about how we voted (they went to the polls with us) and their efficacy and responsibility as future voters and as citizens of the US. Last, we will talk about MLK day, which is today.

Tomorrow my oldest child will be watching the Inauguration at school, and the rest of us will be watching at home. Here's some information if you are thinking, like me, that this is a great chance to teach your children.

Family night Outline (mostly in question form to keep the kids involved):

• Tomorrow is the Inauguration. What is an Inauguration? What will happen there?
  
  
• Who was our last President? Who is going to be the new President?
  
  
• What do you know about Barack Obama? He is married and has two daughters who are 10 and 7 years old. They will live in the White House in Washington, D.C. Mom and Dad have visited the White House. What do you think it would be like to live there?
  
  
• What does the President do? Would you like to be President someday? Or work in the Government? Mom worked on Capitol Hill when she was in college.
  
  
• How did Barack Obama get to be President?
  
  
• Where did we go when we voted? How old do you have to be to vote? Should everyone vote or is it okay to stay home and not vote? What if people stopped voting? Mom and Dad always vote. Will you vote every time when you grow up?
  
  
• Do you know what holiday is today? Who was MLK and why was he special? What does he have in common with President Obama?
  
  
• We will end with a prayer that the President will turn to God for guidance and will be inspired to make the right decisions as he leads our country.
  
  
• Then, if the kiddos are lucky, we may watch the "Kid's Inaugural: We are the Future" concert, which will be broadcast on the Disney Channel tonight (8:00 Eastern/7:00 Pacific)

The first Capitol Inauguration

Inauguration Day:

• Nickelodeon will be showing short clips during the day of the Inauguration and a youth perspective.
• The Inauguration starts at 11:30 E/8:30 Pacific and will be broadcast on all major networks.
• 2:30 PM/11:30 Pacific is the start of the Parade.
• There are all kinds of galas and balls in the evening. There is a Youth Inaugural Ball which will be on MTV, but I detest MTV so we won't be watching that. The Neighborhood Inaugural Ball will be broadcast on ABC.

Related links:

Today is also a National Day of Service, in honor of MLK. Go here to enter your zip code and get local opportunities to participate.

Pictures and information from the US Senate on the Inauguration process and Inaugurations past.

For older kids: NPR story on the Oath of Office.

Youtube video (1:45) with pictures of the President from his childhood and including his family.

Dear Bossy Readers!

I need some advice.

Some of my favorite people in the world are coming to visit me next week. I will have 11 houseguests for 5 days & nights. What is required to be a good hostess? Please keep in mind that I am not Martha, I have very young children who require constant attention, but I also want my guests to have a lot of fun and feel welcomed and loved.

Thinking about times you've visited family, and times that you've hosted, what are the things I can do to make everyone's stay enjoyable?

Thanks!
Sally

I'll take fries with that.

Seriously. This wasn't even in the Halloween Costume Department.



This is Boobie Bag. The maker even suggests how charming they would be for all the girls in a wedding party to carry. (she so cleverly uses the hooks and eyes from the back as fasteners for the top, you know, so nothing spills out.

The internet can be a great place for a laugh. Have I told you all that I seriously believe in laughing? I think it is CRITICAL for survival. So here is one last laugh. I found it on a blog and laughed so hard I woke up the sleeping baby on my lap.

Here is a good Laugh!

Mr. and Mrs. Fenton are retired, and Mrs. Fenton insists
her husband go with her to Walmart,
but he gets bored with all the shopping trips.
He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to browse.
Here's a letter sent to Mrs. Fenton------

Dear Mrs. Fenton,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below.
Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Walmart:

June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals

July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.

July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and watched what happened.

August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.

November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.

December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

And last, but not least .....

December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

Regards, Walmart

Calling All Bookworms

I love old books. They are wonderful to decorate with. I have them stashed around my house on bookcases and plant shelves. I love to look for old books at yard sales and antique shops. Sometimes I find special ones, like this one for Roland:

Other times I find beautiful ones:
The end pages are filled with colorized art and often there is a dedication written in the front:

This one was given to my great Grandma.

Imagine my surprise when I came home from book club last month and realized that the book we were reading is actually a book I use for decoration! The Robe by Lloyd C Douglas. I didn't read my copy, bought at a yard sale years ago, it is falling apart. But I rushed out and got a new copy and I LOVE this book.It is historical fiction about the centurion who conducted the crucifixion of Christ, how he came to own the Robe that belonged to Christ, and what happened to him after the crucifixion. I have never read a book set in this time period and I find it fascinating. The way the Jews act, the way people talk about Christ, and the way Douglas shows the cultural, political, and social impact of His crucifixion are eye opening.

One of the things I really love about this book is that Jesus doesn't actually speak or interact with the protagonist, but we get to hear the famous stories of Jesus from the view of the people who were there. The stories are touching and the telling of them has made them more real to me.

When the book was published in 1941 it was rather scandalous and the Catholic church came out against it because of the way it portrayed Jesus. Now the church encourages people to read the book. Times are a changin'.
The Robe was made into a huge hit movie. But I am going to be bossy and tell you to read the book before you see the movie. Actually, skip the movie altogether. Your imagination is much better than the movie making of 1952.

My turn to post

To all our amazing and fabulous readers I would like to apologize. Today was my turn to post on Bossy! and I totally blew it.

Why would I do this?, you might ask. Well, I have no good reason at all. On Monday, I thought, "Oh, I need to do my post for Bossy! tomorrow", and I started to gather some thoughts about what to post. But perhaps Emily's Neti Pot post just pushed it all out of my mind. I don't know. Everytime I've blown my nose though, since Em's post (which is frequent as I'm getting over a cold), I think "I wish I could try a Neti Pot." This morning, that was one of the first thoughts to go through my mind after, "Why can't my 15 year old use an alarm clock? What is wrong with him? What is wrong with me that I continue to support this self-indulgent behavior?" Then my mind went straight from there to "I wish I had a Neti Pot". I don't know, it's hard to beat a post that has a woman pouring liquid into one nostril and watching it pour out of the other. Thanks Em!

Anyway, I just have one little thing to blog about today... that is time. I have a lot of time on my hands now, as I was just laid off of my job (which stinks!). And guess how I am filling my time? Yup...T.V. All the new seasons have begun. I am DVRing, among other shows, The Biggest Loser (Holy Smokes!), True Beauty (my guilty show - but my kids don't know it or see it), Psych (my favorite), American Idol (I'll decide after a few episodes if I want to continue), Ugly Betty, 30 Rock, The Office, and Superstars of Dance. Good-Grief! Like I'll ever have enough time to watch all of that.

I need to get focused. Can I justify all this TV if I do jumping jacks during all the commercials? Probably not because I fast forward through them. Maybe if I do jumping jacks during the opening theme song portion of the show?


What are your T.V. shows? Do you DVR or just watch? Do you have "guilty" shows that you watch? If so...dish!

Today's Fave: The Neti Pot

by Emily

As someone who suffers from typical allergies and sinus colds, I was so happy when my s-i-l encouraged me to try the neti pot during our Christmas holiday. I was on day 3 of a sinus cold, and it was only getting worse. I was a little freaked out about the neti pot, but she walked me through it. It was easy! And it really helped. If you want to try it, and are freaked out, call me and I'll walk you through it.

I felt an immediate improvement--it relieved the sinus pressure, rinsed out a lot of gunk, and let my body get ahead of the cold. It's not a cure-all, and it's not a drastic measure to take, but it simply rinses things out so you can start to feel better. Plus, I feel like the salt in the saline soothed my post nasal drip sore throat. Also, it improves your sense of smell.

This is the same brand neti pot I use. You can buy it at any pharmacy (CVS, Longs, Walgreens, even WalMart has it.) I like it because it comes with pre-measured saline packets, so all you have to do is add warm water. Easy. It was only $14.99, and worth every penny.

So, have you heard of it? My first reaction was: gross, I want to try it! But will it hurt? Is it invasive? How can you breath while you do it?

Basically the neti pot rinses out your nasal passage with the gentle force of gravity and saline water. It doesn't actually go into your sinuses, but creates a gentle drop in pressure that gently drains your sinuses. Gentle. Really, it is gentle, and you use warmish water, so it feels good too.


Here is a video demonstration. I don't bother with the "stretch exercises" afterwards, but why not? Easy enough and might feel nice if you have time.


And finally, a NY Times article, because, you know, if it's in the NY Times, it's gotta be good.

Le's go to hav sum fun!

My first grader made this for me right before school started this year. How could I resist this request? We went to the beach, and I keep this visible to remind me to hav sum fun.

One of my favorite ways to have fun is travel. It may be my most preferred (and most expensive) hobby. Before children, I traveled extensively for education, fun, and business and also lived in Moscow, Russia; Paris, France; and various states in the US. Now that we have these crazy little people running around, we've dialed it back a lot. Still, we take trips whenever we can, and I look forward to visiting Asia and Africa and other exotic locales as soon as our family and budget allow (sounds like a long time from now). In the meantime, we mostly stay in North America.

I am not a high-end traveler. When my husband and I lived in Paris 12 years ago, we spent a whole month sleeping in our rental car as we explored all of western Europe. Even if I'm on an expense report, I don't need the most luxurious hotels or the trendiest restaurants. However, I do want a good night's sleep in a comfortable hotel, and I need to eat delicious food and see the most interesting things. Do you like to travel, too? If so, you are in luck today. Because I am super nice, I'm going to share with you how I manage: my three favorite travel-related websites.

Hotel:

biddingfortravel.com This website is a web forum that will help you get great prices on hotels (and car and air). People come here and learn how to strategically bid for hotels on Priceline, then they report their winning (and losing) bids. The first time you visit this site, ignore the clunky design and read all the instructions. Then go crazy. We have stayed at super luxury resorts for $100/night. We were in Quebec City about 2 years ago and stayed at a Loews with a killer view room that would have been $325/night, but we got it for $67! On the lower end, I've stayed in Residence Inns for $30/night. Emily just got a great room at a luxury hotel in Chicago for an upcoming trip, thanks to Priceline and biddingfortravel.com. Never book a hotel without checking here first.

Food:

Chowhound.com message boards This is my kind of place. These are people who love good food but don't care for pretension. People ask questions, write reviews, and give advice freely. There are some snobby foodies, but you're likely to see a hole-in-the-wall Thai joint recommended right alongside a tres chic, expensive French restaurant. When I am traveling to a new destination, I always do my research at Chowhound first to find out what the local specialties are, where are the best places to eat at any budget, and what to order. I've found fantastic places to eat in LA, New Orleans, Hawaii, Mexico and even Germany. This is one of my favorite websites of all time because I LOVE TO EAT GOOD FOOD.

What to see and do:
Fodors Travel Talk Forums These forums are populated by experienced travelers and locals who want to share what they know. I have used these forums to plan trips to everywhere from Rio de Janiero to Rome to Provo, UT. Seven years ago we took a cruise through the Caribbean. I planned wonderful and fun excursions for us at every port thanks to the Fodors forums. We traveled by cab, daily rental car or pedicab, got to all the sights when they were still peaceful and easy to see, and just as we were leaving to go to our next activity the cruise buses would pull up with their hundreds of passengers. We also saved money by not going with the cruise line. I will never forget snorkeling in Jamaica--we were the first ones to the reef, saw barracuda and amazing fish, and after an hour or two we left when the hordes of cruise tourists arrived. Sweet! One tip--before you ask a question, do a search on the site first to see if the question has already been asked. There's so much great info, not just on sightseeing and activities, but also hotels and restaurants.

All the Bossy Sisters like to travel. We love travel stories. If you want to share yours with us, please do! When my friends go on vacation, I always request a detailed trip report when they're home. Vicarious travel is pretty good if you're as addicted as I am.

I'm going to go to hav sum fun now.

Holding

I was at the hospital with a friend last night. A few minor complications with her precious baby girl, left her 6 hours out of the womb and not being cuddled yet. My friends arms were aching. All she wanted was to hold her baby. I couldn't help but go back in my mind to the 10 days we waited to hold my Eve for the first time. 10 days. My arms literally ached for her. One time we had to go 21 days. 21 days without her in my arms. Torture for a mother or father. It just struck me how much we want to HOLD to fix things. My friend kept saying, "If I could just hold her, maybe she'd be ok." (she is ok by the way, more than ok, beautiful and fine. Just fine.)

So, I got thinking as I drove home (after finally watching Mom and Baby cuddle and love and bond.) Holding. It is so important. I love to hold my babies, awake, asleep, big, little, cuddly, squirmy, hurt or healthy. We offer to hold hands when someone needs comfort or safety. We hold hands when we walk, to show affection and/or protection. We hold each other to show Love. Isn't holding so nice?

Holding. I think it is Human Nature to want to "Hold" someone when they need help. Do you?
So reach out! Hold someone!
Images from Flickr, aren't they good?

My Deadly Habit

As I type this, I have crumbs on my kitchen floor, fingerprints on the sliding glass door, a laundry room overflowing with dirty vacation clothes, and leftover Christmas Crud in the family room.

But my ears are clean.

Clean ears are my obsession. Oh, I won’t notice if your ears are dirty, I’m too busy thinking about mine. I don’t even notice if my kids have dirty ears. In fact, it’s not uncommon to find actual potatoes growing in my boy’s ears. But you will never find anything in my ears except swabs.

Q-tips are the only thing that works. Store brand swabs won't cut it. I buy Q-Tips in bulk at Costco.

I have to clean my ears everyday – sometimes 3 times a day. I wash them with shampoo in the shower and then thoroughly dry them with the towel and then I swab them. If I am showering later in the day due to my (vigorous) workout schedule, I have to swab them before I workout, and then again after my shower, and sometimes I even swab them before bed. Just writing this make my ears ache to be swabbed. It’s ridiculous.

The origin of this obsession is too personal to share on the World Wide Web (but it involves a boy trying to stick his slobbery tongue in my ear, on a date, and I still haven’t recovered – I am still trying to get rid of his nasty germs). But I can tell you it has been going on for over 25 years and will stick with me until the day I die.

The day I die may not be far off. O Magazine said you are not supposed to clean your ears with swabs because it forces the earwax back into your ears. Now, the article didn’t say this part, but think about how close your ears are to your brain…what if that wax got forced into your brain? Generally, it is dangerous to force anything, waxy or not, into your brain.

I engage in life threatening behavior daily.

Don’t try to talk me out of my addiction. There is no 12 step program strong enough to stop me. No tough love strategy can change my ways. When my time comes I will be ready with clean underwear and Q-Tips.

And my ears will be clean.
Just in case.

Productivity and an Educational Time Waster

I was very productive today. I worked on building my home based business (Scentsy) for several hours, I drove my teenage son and his friend to school, I did 3 1/2 hours of home-schooling with my 12 year old and drove him to and from band. I actually made both breakfast and lunch for my boys (but not dinner - they were on their own for that), I read for an hour in a book I've been trying to find time to read, I downloaded my Christmas pictures, and I did some housecleaning.

But this is what I did tonight as I was trying to wind down and get ready for bed...

http://www.sheppardsoftware.com/states_experiment_drag-drop_Intermed_State15s_500.html

I apparently don't know anything about where the states belong in the mid-west, because I totally messed all those up. But, I did pretty good on the west coast, southwest, south and east coast.

I got a score of 80%, in 302 seconds, and average miss of 55 miles.

How good are you at Geography?

Next Christmas Wish List

by Emily

Have you, your children, your husband, or anyone else you know, already begun to make next year's wish list?

I thought I would be gifted-out to the max. Done, done, and done. But then I saw what cool gifts others got, and to top it off, I read the Sky Mall magazine yesterday on the airplane.

The Sky Mall magazine is great, it has all the gadgets and gizmos you've thought about inventing for yourself and then realized that it really wasn't worth it. It has a way of making me feel anew in my motivation to organize every little thing in my life when I arrive home.

It is also great fodder for some hilarity during your flight. Joe and I flip through and show each other various items with our own commentary, "Now, I've always wanted one of those!" or "Seriously, is pouring yourself a glass of water so difficult that you need a machine that does it for you?" Etc. You get the idea.

Here are a few of my faves:

The "Progressive Wake-Up Clock"

I love that it isn't called an "alarm" clock, because HELLO! that would be too ALARMING which is beside the point. I've been wanting one of these for the last 6 years. As with everything in Sky Mall, I don't want it bad enough to spend the ridiculous money on it ($60+, no thanks)

The "Slanket"

Buy multiple Slankets for your guests to enjoy! Embroider them with family members' initials! Get one for the dog! These Fleece One-Size-Fits-All Slankets are FAR superior to those nasty old blankets the proletariat use. Our Slanket can be WORN! WORN, I SAY!

The "Pet Crate End Table"

Seriously? Why do you even have a dog?

And finally...

The "SkyRest Travel Pillow"
Oh Please, oh please, oh please, don't let me sit next to that guy. And do you really want to be "that guy"? You know, the one who is still blowing up his travel pillow halfway into the flight? "Ahem, excuse me while I inflate my huge drool pillow. Could you just scoot? I need some elbow room while I puff this thing up. If I pass out, I think there is an air-mask thingy you can use to revive me."

Is there a Sky Mall/As Seen on TV gadget you've pined after?

Buh-bye, Santa

It's still Christmas at our house. Josh Groban is singing Little Drummer Boy to me, three reindeer are enjoying their spot in the kitchen, and not one ornament has been packed up.

Last year around this time, my friend Paige proclaimed the Christmas Decoration Rule. Christmas decorations must be down by her Jan 9 birthday (her sister Celia probably disagrees). Because I respect and appreciate other bossy women I must comply, even though I live nowhere near her. So it's time to take 'em down.

Goodbye sparkly tree. You make me feel peaceful. Especially the night that my kids and I sat in front of you for an hour singing Christmas carols, my favorite event of the whole season.

Goodbye super cute Santa. Great work not getting destroyed by the kids who tried to ride the reindeer.

And goodbye to you, just a small portion of the medicine we and our many wonderful houseguests needed to get through this holiday alive:

Josh Groban and I are going to hang out for a few more weeks. Sorry, Paige.

Here's a tip on getting the kids to help clean up:

Hide wrapped candies (hershey kisses, perhaps) in a few spots on the tree and around your other Christmas decor. The kids can search for the candies while they help put away the decor. No candy can be unwrapped or eaten until all the decorations are put away. It's like a New Year's Easter Egg hunt.

Need Advice!

One of our readers sent us a request for advice and I thought we should open it up for all to share their sage wisdom:

...............................
Dear Bossy,

I could use some help. My four year old daughter has a bossy best friend. She is five years old and lives next door. I wouldn't quite describe her as a bad influence friend - she can be quite nice, but whoo boy - she needs to control EVERY aspect of play when they are at our house. In my mind I call her the "Little Dictator" . She is starting to drive me crazy.

An example of the dictator behavior: "You stand there. When I blow on this whistle you can dance, when I stop you need to stop. No, no, no you're not playing right. I TOLD you you need to do it this way. I'll go into the other room and let you know when you can come play, but don't move until I call you. No, I told you not to come in until I called you. And stop dancing, until I blow the whistle."

My daughter will play along with her dictates for quite a long time, but eventually she starts to chaffe at having no control over the play. The end result is either me stepping in and suggesting that they take turns coming up with the play or my daughter telling her that she is mean and she does not want to be her friend anymore. Either of these scenarios leads to her stating that she "wants to go home". It's all I can do not to shove her out of the house. I know I need to control my irritation and come up with a solution but I'm at a loss. Any ideas?

A Recipe for The New Year!

My mom gave me this recipe about 18 years ago and it is still wonderful today! This is not a one bowl recipe, but it is worth the mess it makes.

Peppermint Ice Cream Cake

1st Layer:
1/3 lbs graham cracker crumbs
1 cup chopped nuts

Spread crumbs in 9x13 pan and sprinkle nuts on top of crumbs.

2^nd Layer:

1 cup butter - divided

3 squares bitter chocolate

4 cups powdered sugar

1 t vanilla

Dash salt

6 egg yolks *

6 egg whites – beat stiff

Melt chocolate in microwave with ¼ cup butter. Beat in mixer with the rest of the butter, sugar, vanilla and salt (dough will be quite thick at this point). Add egg yolks. Gently fold in egg whites. Spread evenly over the 1^st layer and put in freezer until hard.

3^rd Layer:

2 quarts peppermint ice cream

Soften a little and spread over frozen chocolate mixture. Drizzle with chocolate if you like. Freeze until serving time.

Serves 20

Illustrated Directions (for those of us who are visual learners):

Make your crumbs in your blender - I chop my nuts here too!

Nuts can be coarse in texture.
Beat the whites while the chocolate is melting and set them aside.
Add the melted chocolate. Notice that I didn't bother to clean the leftover egg whites out of the mixing bowl. Just leave them there.

Before you add the yolks the mixture is very thick.

Fold in the whites very carefully to keep them light and fluffy.

Pour mixture over the crumb/nut base and freeze until hard.

Scoop ice cream on top of frozen base and then let it soften until it can be spread evenly.

"Limited Edition". This is still in stores! Go buy 3 cartons now (1 1/2 for the recipe and the rest for leisure eating). This also makes a pretty and yummy Valentine's treat!

The child closest to age 10 in your family can drizzle the chocolate (we used Hersey's syrup).

* Because this contains raw eggs you will want to warn any pregnant ladies or super old people and give them a bowl of peppermint ice cream instead.