How to: ER version.

By Melissa



I always wondered what you would do if you had to take your child to the emergency room. Would you hop in the car, blood spurting, leg bending backwards and race as fast as you can? Maybe. We luckily haven't had those kind of emergencies. My pediatrician told me once about a woman who was convinced she could get her baby to the ER faster than waiting for an ambulance, it was the wrong choice-- Don't try this, paramedics know what they are doing and can do it while driving- you can't. If it is truly life and death, get the help you or your loved one needs.

However, over the past 11 years of parenting we've logged in more than our fair share of non-life threatening but Emergency Room worthy hospital time. After this past weeks visit I thought, "I'm getting good at this! I should blog about it!" So, here are my tips for "enjoying" your E.R./ hospital stay.

If you do have time, it is worth taking 5 minutes before rushing out the door to grab a few things. These are my essentials:

1. A blanket for the child, hospitals think a sheet is a blanket! Something cozy and familiar makes sleeping somewhere foreign much nicer. Also, binkies, teddy bear, American Girl Dolls. ;) Whatever is their "lovey".
2. Clean clothes for you both (really, you are likely to get bled on, puked on, spilled on, or end up staying longer than you expected and want to freshen up.) Don't forget dry underwear for your kiddo. Honestly, even the child that never has accidents, when there is an I.V., new meds can surprise you... it is worth it to have extras.
3. Cozy socks and a sweater. Hospitals are cold year round, especially at night!
4. Glasses/contact case, make up or at least lip gloss
5. Insurance info and cell phone (this probably should be closer to the top, but they have all this stuff already!)
6. entertainment. We "frequent" a children's hospital (one of the best!) but even still, it is nice to have some books, stickers, coloring stuff, nintendo ds....
7. Entertainment for you and maybe some snacks. Your child will not be able to eat till a doctor ok's it, but you might get hungry and might not want to leave your child alone to track down a candy bar... (I'm thinking I might be the only one who can't go anywhere without packing enough food in her purse to not be starving... I take food everywhere, so maybe skip this and go to number 8.)
8. Money for vending machines! :)

Alright, here are my tips for surviving once you are there.

1. Be really nice. It pays. People are nice to you when you are nice to them. It would seem logical, but when you are stressed sometimes it is easy to over react about little things.
2. Listen to the names of the people who are caring for your child. Repeat them and use them. This isn't' just nice, but helps when "Mary" comes in to start an i.v. and you can say "Anne" just said we were going for x-rays before putting in the iv. Or whatever. It helps.
3. Ask questions and write things down. You are your child's advocate! Make sure you understand what is happening.
4. Eat! Our hospital lets you buy meals to be delivered with your child's. They are reasonably priced, but I tend to "over order" for her not knowing what she would eat, then I finish it off. I think my husband orders a meal of his own... either way, it is important to not be starving! (again, I'm probably just going back to that irrational fear of going hungry... do what works for you!)
5. Once your child is settled, get your own needs met. This past week we were spending the night in the emergency observation department. There was a stretcher for my girl and a chair for me. Not even a soft chair. I cheerfully asked if there was anything more comfortable I could sit on and they brought in a lovely chair/bed thingy. So much nicer for the next 18 hours!

Last of all, It is all about Perspective. We've driven to the emergency room, we've taken ambulances, we've even arrived in a helicopter, but each time, it only takes a minute to realize how blessed we are to be able to get such outstanding care. This week, I watched at least 4 stretchers being wheeled in, kids with neck braces, hustling paramedics and sobbing parents trailing after them. There is just something about a Children's Hospital... if you think your life stinks, go, walk around for an hour and count your many blessings.

Good Enough

by Emily

This fall I started school again full time, working on my Master's degree in Literature. I'm doing it for the money.

(read: sarcasm)

There is a lot to talk about here--a lot about the change of pace, and the weird feeling of living a double life. Mostly there is a lot to talk about my constant reflection and reevaluating the situation as it affects our family, most especially our children.

In a "letter" to my sisters on our private forum, I wrote the following:

"So, I'm having one of those weeks, day after day, where I keep thinking "Who am I kidding? I thought I could do this?" It is getting ROUGH.


This time of year is always hectic, and with school now--and all the church activities and services, I have a hard time not feeling a bit...resentful? Like, between Monday and Sunday, I don't have a single "free-day" to catch up on all the stuff that has slipped through the cracks--some of it pretty essential stuff. But then I ask: how I would change it? Would I want to be released from Primary (Primary is Sunday School for children ages 3-11), or quit school, or just never be home and always work super hard up on campus away from all distractions? And I realize I wouldn't change any of those things. I like being in the Primary, school has been really good for me, and most of all, my kids are the most important of all these things to me--and I want to be home with them as much as possible."

I have to get used to doing things so that they are "good enough," and that is new and hard for me.

Joe is doing even more household and parenting things than what he's already used to doing (which is to say, he's always been very active in those areas of our family life). Even so, the floor is often icky, and the clean laundry may not get folded before it is worn and needs washing again, and my 2 & 4 yr olds will keep on running in circles, laughing and whining. My hair might stick up kinda funny, and I'll probably choose the comfortable shoes over the cute ones. But let's be honest--was it much different before I started school? It's not as if I was ever a stellar housekeeper. I do make good food though--when I have time.

So here's my pat on my own back: we keep on making time for family dinner even if it is frozen Bertolli meals (I recommend the ones with shrimp). And if you're lucky you'll still be invited over to our house for that dinner, but the house may be less tidy than before, and the dessert might also come from the freezer (ice cream). And the Sunday School lessons will still be just as every bit delivered from the heart, but the handouts might not have pretty ribbon or glitter glue on them. And the homework gets done, and I'm reading faster everyday.

And still the best part of my day isn't nailing that class presentation or paper, but coming home to my family for our daily dinner, pajama, scripture/prayer, and bed routine. That, and stealing one last glimpse and kiss when my babies are fast asleep.

The replies I got from my Bossy Sisters let me know that 1) they believe in me, 2) they love me, 3) they've been there too (haven't we all?), and 4) they are good listeners.

Here is just a snippet:

"Let the little things go. If that doesn't work, let the mid-size things go. :) "
-Bossy Sister Melissa

"You have taken on a serious challenge and you are rising to meet the demands. You can do this! I think you will always be glad you did it."
-Bossy Sister Sally

"I understand completely. It is really hard but you can do hard things. I love you. Hang in there. You are amazing."
-Bossy Sister Robin


And finally, the one that made me laugh the most:

"Well, you took a pretty big bite. I wouldn't be surprised if you have to chew with your mouth open and a few little crumbs fall out."
-Bossy but Wise (and funny) Robin



Is there anything in your life that you're willing to admit to doing just "good enough"? What secret tricks of the trade can you share with me? (I need them!)

Library!

School has been out for 1 week. Sibling rivalry is rampant, the cold cereal and everything resembling chips, candy, or white bread has disappeared (did they eat this much in school?), and we have been to the library two times already.In my hometown, Boise, the library is called the "Library!" the sign actually has an exclamation point. People scoffed at it when it first was named but those who use the library get the exclamation point. The Library! is exciting! It is full of fun things for your kids!You feel smart just driving there!It promises peace and quiet and a temporary break from rivalry! Or at least a quiet ride home from the Library! Its air conditioned! LIBRARY!!!!!

Here are a few tips for maximum Library! enjoyment and success:

• Let your kids check out what they want. Ike has 4 Calvin and Hobbes books. Noah is on an Orson Scott Card jag.
• Allow your kids to check out as many as they want.
• Make your kids carry their own books (they won't check out as many).
• Take advantage of summer reading programs and special events.
  
• Teach your kids how to use the self-checkout. Sure, it takes more time, but why are you rushing home? To make more snacks, yell at the kids to turn off the TV, make lunch, tidy up the house, make another snack?
• If you have teenagers start reading what they read and find recommendations (goodreads.com is nice). There are lots of trashy/creepy/depressing teen books. Preview what they read, work to find a list of books they might be interested in, books that make them feel good after reading them.
  
• The great thing about the library is if you don't like a book, you can return it unread. No pressure to get your money's worth.

But my number one tip is:

Use the online catalog to order the books you want. You simply log on (you might need to set up a password and stuff but it is sooo worth the 5 minutes that takes) and type in the name of the book you are interested in, put a hold on the book, and a day or two later (unless you want the #1 book on the best seller's list this week) you waltz into the library (have them sent to the branch nearest your home) and pick up your books. I often pick up 6 or more books at a time: cookbooks, non-fiction, fiction, how to, DVD's, CD's - you name it. Then, because you are online- they will send you a little reminder email informing you that your book is due and you can renew it ON LINE! so cool! No more late fees!

What books are you reading this summer?

Learn something new...

by Kristen

A couple of years ago I took a class at Boise State University with 3 of my friends. It was a spanish class. We had a blast! Every Tuesday night we'd carpool down to the university and pretend that we had studied during the week and laugh and visit and learn some spanish. Sometimes after class, we would go out for dessert and once we all got together for a study session (yes, we did try to take it seriously).

Our instructor, Maria, was from Spain, and she was darling. She told us we could only speak spanish in the class, so we prefaced all our english with "Tengo un pregunta", which is something like "I have a question", and then we would ask our question in english. We would also say, "¿Cuál es el significado..." to ask what something meant. But my favorite, by far was "¿Cómo se dice...". Which is "How do you say...?"

My dear friend, Teri, would always ask funny questions like, "¿Cómo se dice butt?" or "¿Cómo se dice nasty?" Maria just would laugh at us and answer our questions. I wonder if it bothered her that we didn't take it very seriously. I don't think so. But it did bother our class mates. Some of them were VERY serious about this community ed introduction to spanish class.

Anyway, if you are wondering butt = culo, nasty = sucio.

The following video is a very funny clip about "spanish for your nanny"...





Currently I am taking a Water Safety Instructor class. It is awesome!

All my life I've wanted to be able to swim the Butterfly stroke, and all my life I have caused great anxiety for nearby life-guards and swimmers when I have tried. It is a hard stroke to learn!

But on Monday night - in a 3 hour class, I DID IT! I learned the Butterfly! I am so on cloud nine for this accomplishment. It was just so cool to finally get it. The timing, the breathing, the kicks, the stroke, it all came together. I'm not saying it was pretty, but I did it and the Master's Swim Coach who was teaching me was pleased and said she'd give it a "pass". I will be working on this a lot in days to come. And I know my shoulders will be dying tomorrow...


BUT I DID IT!!!!!


(Later, in some other post I'll tell you about me and Michael Phelps...yeah, I know him. We're tight! That's why I used a picture of him in this post.)




I'm already thinking about what class I'm going to take after the WSI class is over. I want to get back into pottery, so maybe I'll find a community ed pottery class.



Taking a class makes you feel younger, more vibrant. When you learn a new skill, you feel accomplished. And even if you don't learn a lot (as in the case of my spanish classes), if you take the class with some friends, you'll have a blast.

Why, just last night I went to a couponing class. It was so awesome! Thank you Discount Queens! I can't wait to start saving money! When I left I felt smarter, more resourceful, and I had a little spring in my step. Amazing how just one little class can do that for you!

Think about it - you could take:

a dance class

a language class

a finance class

a parenting class

a pole-dancing or belly dancing class

a gardening class

an exercize class

a religion class

a cooking/culinary class

a kayaking class

or pick any subject a the university - psychology, biology, math, education, history, etc.

you could even take a capoeira class (see video below). I have a friend, Cherie, who is very good at capoeira, she teaches it at the YMCA.




What kind of class do you want to take?

Mother's Day Miscellany

by Emily

I've been a mother for a few years now. Nothing compared to my sisters' experience as mothers, and especially nothing compared to my mother and mother-in-law's experience. [I can't imagine what it will be like to be mother to older children, and I DON'T want to imagine it! Wah!] Still, I spend a lot of time thinking about motherhood. What it means to me, how it changes a woman. I read books about it.

I am it, I guess.

This is just to say to my own mother and other mothers out there, I love you. My appreciation and understanding of the magnitude of your sacrifice, love, service and devotion, and priceless worth grows deeper each year.

Some women hate mother's day. I think I can understand the complexities it holds for many of us, mothers or not. I can imagine the many ways it could be a rough day for people with different experiences than mine. It makes me ache for them.

This year I am helping organize a small gift for all the women who go to church on Sunday. It is small. But just planing this makes me excited and gets me thinking about all the women I know and love, and their unique role in my life. I love being a part of this gesture to honor them, mothers or not.

I am looking at mother's day this year as a way to show honor and reverence for the role of mother. I am thankful for a loving God whose plan included mothers. I am thankful for the mother He gave me.

I wait with anticipation for my sister-in-law Erin to become a mother. There is something so special and magical about that first time, the transition into Motherhood. I think Erin may very well be the best mother I'll ever know. First of all (not first in importance though), she is pretty, and beautiful, and cute.

Beautiful, Radiant, Gorgeous. Woman!

[ It is so gratifying to look at your mommy and feel that she is "the most beautiful girl in the whole world". I always felt that way about my own mother, still do.]

Second of all Erin is giving, kind, generous, selfless, nurturing, thoughtful, cheerful, long suffering, fun, loving, beloved, love, love, love ,love, love. She really is all those things. All those loves.

Sometimes she asks me for advice, and that makes me feel good.

I know what I am talking about because I have a wonderful mother.
I love you, Mom. I don't know if I can do it as well as you did it, but I keep trying.

Pee Pee Face

The other day, Rocio, my wonderful housekeeper, told me that I need to have another baby and then right after the baby is born, for 2 months, put my pee on my face to get rid of my sun spots. She said she did it and it worked. But only right after the baby is born. Actually, I wasn't sure if she meant my pee or the baby's pee (language barrier) but I am pretty sure she meant that I should use my own. Pee. On my face.

She also told me she can get some cream from Mexico for me that will make me look like a bloated monster for 3 days but then after a month my skin will all fall off and then I will have gorgeous new skin. Only $100.

This was unsolicited, by the way. I was minding my own business, it's not like I asked her "what do you think about my skin? Do you think it needs some pee?"

I have heard lots of crazy folk wisdom, especially when I lived in Russia, but this may top them all.

Next time you see someone with flawless skin, remember: they may be a pee pee face.

A few questions...

by Kristen



We Bossy sisters have our own little forum just for keeping in touch with each other. We discuss things our Bossy audience may not be interested in, and perhaps might be TMI to share with everyone. A few years ago, one of the Bossy sisters posted these questions to get our feed-back. I was just rereading some of our posts and came across this and thought it would be interesting to get our reader's insights. I have added a few questions as well as the originals.


Please share your thoughts on these issues (or just the ones you want to address):



How do you feel about 2 piece swim suits? Is there an ok age and a not ok age?



What about tank tops or sleeveless dresses?



What about toe rings, anklets, or excessive jewelry?



How old is old enough for ears pierced? (obviously a girl, but you can tell me for a boy too.)



When did you tell your children how babies are born? Did you go into the conception process or just the birth thing?



Is soda ok? Caffeinated?



Rub on tatoos? or is that Rub off tatoos? :)



How old for make-up and shaving legs?



Should you ever interfere with or address your children's music preferences? Why or why not?



How do you address teenage modesty for boys (i.e. 6 inches of underwear showing above the waistline)?



Do you or would you ever read your kid's journal? Why or why not?



Do you cater to picky eaters?



I can't wait to read your comments!

To Vax or not to Vax

By Melissa

Last week, I sat in the pediatrician's office, watching my 3 healthy children play with blocks. I was hemming and hawing about which shots, if any, we should get during this "well child" visit.

My first few children were vaccinated on the recommended schedule. Never any real worries, just sadness over the pain. I'd done a lot of reading and concluded it was right for us. Eve came along with a special set of worries and we did her shots a bit different, making sure she had what was most critical and delaying the ones that might cause problems or we deemed least necessary, but she ended up getting everything over time.

FF to Lily. At 20 something months she had a set of shots. Nothing seemed wrong, no obvious fever, but when she woke from her nap she wouldn't stand, at all. She wouldn't bear any weight on her leg. No walking, no crawling, hardly any moving her leg... I was freaked out! (Of course, it was a Friday afternoon. Why do all things questionable happen on Fridays?) Anyway, we kept a close eye on her. 2 weeks later she was back to walking but still limping and our doctor suggested we not finish up that series.

So here I sit, watching my sweet Henry, who at 18 months has only had a handful of shots (and a minor (major to a mother) reaction with the last set) and I concluded-- no shots today. (again!) We'll start to catch up next time... with this baby, the maternal instinct has been loud and clear-- hold off, go slow! My doctor has been understanding, and even supportive. I love her.

When the doctor came in, she looked over his records. I told her my plan: MMR at 2. I can do that. I'm comfortable with that. She then said, in the way a friend talks to a friend, "Melissa, I admitted a child for Mumps this morning. A child who was out, playing with those same blocks in the waiting room. ---And the next county over has an Measels outbreak! Measels Melissa!"

And I looked at my baby. And I panicked. What is worse, worrying about possible side effects to vaccinations given to millions of kids, or worrying about my son getting a serious illness I could have prevented. I started to sweat.

I suppose this post could be about determining the voice of fear vs trusting your instinct or listening to God Given Promptings... It is about figuring out what is right for your baby. It isn't easy.

We got an email this week about Gardasil, and it made me wonder how I'll handle that one when the time comes. Hopefully, I'll have answers and be able to listen for them.

And, for what it is worth, I'm not providing any support either way. On purpose. After doing hours and hours of research, I have yet to find a good, solid, unbiased source pro-vax or anti-vax. I'd love to hear your take on it, and what helped you decide... however, all the discussions, IRL and online have been heated. Let's be civil. :)

Know My Struggles - Know Me

by Kristen

I remember someone once saying that you don't really know another person until you know what their struggle is. I think there is a lot of truth to that. Well, I won't bother you with all my struggles, not only would you not want to hear them, I don't want to share them all. But I will share one struggle; the one that has probably taught me the most as a parent thus far (of course, I am learning new lessons daily with a 16 year old in the house now).



This is my son, Rocky.

He is an amazing child! He is funny, happy, hard-working, independent, and confident. Now. But he wasn't always. In fact, for most of his younger childhood he was clingy, insecure, and frustratingly moody. I confess that when he was about 3 years old, I couldn't stand him. Literally, I had moments where I truly felt like I hated this child. Pretty strong, huh? Well, that was it, it was a strong and disturbing emotion that was intertwined with a deep, nurturing, and heart-breaking love for this struggling little boy.

He was a child who would stand in line to ride the merry-go-round at the fair for 20 minutes, then cop out at the moment it was time to get on the ride. He was a child who would only wear "lightening" socks from Shopko and they had to "feel" just right. We went almost two years where he wore nothing but blue jeans and a plain white t-shirt (ages 5-6). He was the one who would get ready for school, then just as the bus came around the corner he would get all morose and drag his feet till he missed the bus. In fact, as he got older, he sabotaged all efforts to get him to school, including undressing in the car on the way to school. I remember him saying one day that he wished his school would explode and that he would die and the whole school would just die. He was only in 4th grade.

The winter of 2006 I noticed him washing his hands an extreme amount and his hands were red and bleeding. We had taught him to sing the "ABC" song twice while he lathered his hands, and he was consistently obedient about that.

One morning I just observed his behavior, it went something like this. Woke up, went into bathroom, washed hands ("ABC" thing), went to bathroom, washed hands, got undressed for shower, washed hands, got towel ready on rack, washed hands, took shower, got out and dried off, washed hands, brushed teeth, washed hands, got dressed, washed hands, came downstairs, washed hands, got breakfast cereal, washed hands, ate breakfast, washed hands, etc. You get the drift. I called the school nurse and she referred him to the school counselor. Later that day the counselor called me and said she had visited with him and thought he might be depressed. "WHAT?!" "No", I thought, "he might be compulsive, but not depressed." That night I googled "childhood depression". The page said that if your child displays 3 or more of the 14 characteristics for more than 3 months, they may be depressed. Rocky had 11 symptoms, and had had them for most of his life.

I took him to the doctor. I took him to a child psychologist. We got him on Zoloft. Three months later while at a med check, I told the doctor what an amazingly different child he was! The doctor said, "Let me introduce you to your son." This is who he is, if his brain produced and held on to the correct balance of chemicals for the correct amount of time, this is who my son would be.

Rocky is a joy in my life! I am amazed by him and the things he does now. Bossy sister Robin can attest to the day we went skiing and Rocky got on the chairlift, by himself, and I stood in the lodge and cried. I couldn't believe his growth and independence.

Now our lives are richer, happier. He is confident and outgoing. The winter "blahs" are still very real in our home, but we are better prepared to cope with them.

Here are some of the things we have enjoyed in the past few years:

Lake Powell with friends.

Wake-boarding

Swimming in Florida, with the sharks (no kidding).

Boating and wake-boarding with friends.

Universal studios where Rocky rode "The Mummy" (awesome ride!) and convinced me to ride "The Hulk" with him.

Bridge-jumping at the cabin.

Oh my! That's a long drop!

Riding the ferris wheel at Santa Monica Pier.

What I have learned is this, we must keep our minds open to the amazing potential our children have, even when they struggle and seem to be lost causes. Utilize the resources available to us, love them, and embrace every good moment!

Do Something Nice For Your Husband

by Emily

Or, if you don't have a husband, do something nice for someone who plays a major role in your life.

For me, the something nice is sometimes just a cheerful smile and can-do attitude. Sometimes its a house that is quickly picked up and dinner ready to go when he gets home from work, topped off with a cheerful, "Daddy's home! Yay!" (*kissy kissy hug hug squeeze*)


About 4 years ago when I was practicing my new role as a SAHM, I decided that for a week straight I would make a deliberate effort to do 3 things each evening when my husband arrived home from work (school):

1. Have the family room and kitchen picked up (just a quick 10 minute pick-up)
2. Have dinner made, or nearly made, when my husband got home (this was new, prior to this we had both been working hard equally outside the home, so dinner was a coin-toss and usually ended up with each-man-for-himself)
3. When he walked in the door: STOP what I was doing, GIVE him a kiss and a squeeze, LOOK him in the eye, and SAY something heartfelt ("I missed you!" "I'm so glad you're home!" "How has your day been?" "My favorite time of day is when you come home!") and LISTEN to him.

Every misguided feminist part of me resisted doing this--terribly. It was so...so...so Dr. Laura. So subservient-housewifish. I felt like I was too good to be relegated to this kind of servitude.

Luckily for me (and my family) I've learned a lot more about service since that time. What a week of marital bliss! I don't do that every evening anymore, but I am more consistent with dinner, and I understand what a difference those things make. I could go on about how it changed the feeling in our home when I did that experiment, I could go on about the miracle of love and service.

It's a good reminder to myself to recommit to those that I love most in life. I wonder what my next experiment should be? Oh yeah...going to bed at 9pm each night. I'm working on that. It's a good one too.

Have you ever done an experiment like this? What has taken you years to find out about your spouse/roommates/co-workers/parents/etc? I really, truly, sincerely want to know. Please share (you might inspire someone)!

Let's Talk About Sex, Baby

Most people wouldn't call me a sexpert even though I am very good at sex.

I've talked to my kids about sex. I wanted them to hear it from me before they heard it at school. I want them to look at me as the expert on all things, including sex, so they can ask me the questions that most parents dread hearing. I want them to have their own knowledge, opinion, and information when they are exposed to their classmate's views on sex so that it won't be a big deal. I want them to view sex as a beautiful private gift between husband and wife and empower them to control their bodies and respect their sexual power.

So I try to be pretty open about it. Use the right names for body parts, answer questions about making out, oral sex, masturbation, what ever they need to know, I want them to ask me. Now, don't be thinking that my kids are comfortable bringing this up - they never mention it. We have to start the discussion every time and it isn't easy.

Knowledge is power, baby. But there can be too much of a good thing.



Did you see this Oprah? When the sex therapist suggests introducing something to your 15 year old daughter, she is suggesting giving her a vibrator. Check out the link here.

What they don't show you in this clip is the teenage girl's reaction. She basically said that it wasn't right. Lots of moms said it wasn't right. I agree. Aren't we sexualizing our children enough without focusing on how to teach them to be more sexually active?

I'd love to see a follow up show on how to keep our children innocent and protect them. How to teach our daughter's that they don't need to hurry and grow up and buy into the sexual pressure they are getting from the world, and if Dr. Berman has her way, from their parents!

What bothers me the most about this is the idea that has been pushed for the last 30 years that "kids are going to do it anyway, so let's be as supportive and helpful as we can!". I can feel myself getting pretty worked up about this. So I will turn it over to you. What do you think? Would you buy your 15 year old daughter a vibrator? Why?

Last year, I posted a blog about how to talk to your kids about sex Click Here to read it.

Part 2: Win Chiska's Give-Away!

Leave a Comment by April 14th (next week) for a chance to win a cool, creative, doable crafty gift from Chiska!

Dear Bossy Readers,
Here is some more hands-on advice and experience from my awesome friend, Chiska. Check out the cool suggestions and links for fun, simple, creative projects (even some that require NO sewing), and LEAVE A COMMENT for a chance to win our Give-Away!

How do you prioritize your life so that you have time for your creative pursuits?

Well honestly, I drop lots of balls. I have a great husband who tries to help me have the time. The other thing is just fitting it into the few minutes here and there.

I keep projects in bags (that zip close--I do have curious children, but it helps) that way I can grab them and work on them when the kids are happily playing and have a few minutes. My son is pretty used to hearing, “let me finish this or that and then I’ll read you that story, help you find that toy, or just come be with you.”

When I get excited about something that’s when it’s the easiest. It’s more difficult to say I want to make something and be motivated to do it, than it is to see something specific and think, “Hmm I want to make a felt sandwich because it looks cool.” Then once I get started and I get really excited because hey I can make this!


What have been some of your favorite projects, some of your nightmarish projects?

I think one of my most favorite was making moccasins for my husband. They were my very first pair of adult moc’s. I used some of my mom’s “toe patterns” to create a design for the beading on the toe. It was fun time with my Mom holding my hand through the process and they turned out! I also love them because I was making a mountain scene with a river and when you look at it upside down it looks like some kind of goofy guy with a mustache snorkeling. I love goofy stuff like that.

I also loved learning to paint silk scarves--another Mom teaching me thing. It was an amazing process and pretty quick results.

Me painting a scarf

Nightmarish:

I think nearly every project has a nightmarish stage in it. For Christmas this lat year I made “picnic” blankets--small rectangles really for my brother’s girlfriend’s kids. I started in September and was really excited it was going to be a pretty simple project. Then of course I creatively made it more complicated. I appliquéd some animals on one and quilted crowns on another. Anyway, I thought I’d be able to sew up the sides pretty easily and after the 4th or 5th time of trying to make it look nice I just got mad and quit. They were very gracious about them, but that’s when I decided that using the machine as a time saving device--or trying to hurry to get something done was a bad idea.

How far in advance do you start thinking about/working on handmade gifts before they have to be given?
I usually pick something to make for someone and whenever I get it done--they get it.

The exception to that is Christmas. On my side of the family we take turns at Christmas time so we only have one family/person each year (there are 6 living kids and my Mom and Dad). That makes it easier. I like to think about it way in advance so I’m less stressed right before Christmas and I have time to mail it. I also have a quirk that says that it’s never too late for a gift. For example I had one of my brother’s for Christmas year before last. He got his gift from me right around April Fools Day. It was a quilt that I’d been working on for him off and on for about 7 years. I’d seen the fabric and thought he’s like it. I was also determined to make it big as I’d made him several blankets and they were always too small. I overcompensated, but it turned out great!

There are things that are quick to make so you can do them last minute.

Have you made anything special for your children while pregnant? Or since they've been born?

You know it’s kind of sad, but I haven’t made much for my kids. When I was pregnant I was so tired (both times) that I haven’t done much for them. I did make a book of pictures of Gram for my little guy so He’d remember her (she passed away two summers ago) I hadn’t realized this until recently when I made a scarf for him and he was so excited he couldn’t stand it.

I do have plans for a wall quilt for my tiny girl and I have some dolls that are in process--they’re my first attempt at dolls and look rather alien like--I call them awake and asleep dolls. My Mom made something like it for me and my three sisters. Her Mom had made a doll for her and each of her sisters when they were small. When her Mom died her Dad took the dolls and kept them for them so they wouldn’t get ruined. Until her sister’s passed away they would get together periodically and have tea parties with the dolls. I also want to make them both ABC quilts modeled after one my Mom made for me when I was young. My oldest loves the alphabet.

What handmade objects did you give for Christmas last year (or recently)?

I’ve already told you about the two small “picnic” blankets. I also made a “hug” blanket for my brother’s girlfriend (when asked what she wanted she said a hug would be just fine--so that’s what she got) I’ve made a couple pairs of moccasins a baby pair and an Plains Indian Style (which was a first for me) for a special birthday for one of my nephews. I also made a laminated list with magnets on the back with all the birthdays in our family for each family. Handy little reference when you need to know whose birthday it is. Most recently I made a felt “lunch” with a couple of bean bags as a birthday gift. I also attempted a flax-filled heating pad--it should be up under the nightmare projects, I still don’t know what the receiver thought of the 7 pound awkward thing, but I have a pretty good idea that it wasn’t good. I hope he fed the flax to his chickens or something.

Last Question: Do you have any suggestions of handmade objects that a beginner would feel is doable, and not too expensive?

Oh my favorite question! But it begs some return questions--what do you have? What do you want to do?


Sewing Machine Projects:

Rice Bag Feet Warmer http://adayinthelifeofthechristensons.blogspot.com/2009/02/tutorialrice-bag-feet-warmer.html

Faux Baby Legs
http://www.flickr.com/photos/babyhopes/sets/72157594274454468/
On this one if it seems complicated keep trying--it’s really not.

Lunch Sack--I’m adding this here, but it works great with felt food for a gift.
http://www.simplicity.com/index.cfmpage=section/classroom/sewprojects/lunchtote/lunchsack.html

Fabric beach balls
I haven’t tried these, but they look like they’d be fun so I’m adding them to the list.
http://www.purlbee.com/fabric-beach-balls/

Hand Sewing Projects:

Felt Food is amazing. This site is the best compilation I’ve found for how to info and patterns. Even the “high end” materials are relatively inexpensive and it’s just fun. For big kids, for little kids--you could make it for just about anybody.
http://www.keeperofthecheerios.com/2008/12/best-felt-food-patterns-from-around-web.html

Felt Sushi
http://hoogliart.wordpress.com/2007/08/08/felt-sushi-tutorial/

I thought this letters ideas was a cute one too--also felt related:
http://muffinsnmore.blogspot.com/2009/02/lovely-letters.html


No Sewing involved:


Button magnets: Buttons are so fun. I have an old cookie tin filled with buttons. I love running my fingers through them--that’s an idea too, make a button “box” for someone. Here’s an idea for magnets (among other things)
http://www.soulemama.com/soulemama/2009/03/button-it-up.html

A Journal--a book, not as hard it might sound.
http://www.jpgmag.com/stories/354

I recently saw a basket someone made from magazines by accordion folding each page and then wrapping them around each other (attaching them with a glue gun). You make a circle base and then overlap them slightly as you move them up to create the “walls”.

Look around your house and ask yourself what can I make with what’s around here?

What can I collect in the natural world?

Nature Printing:

On that point something that I just did recently as a preschool project was “nature printing” you can use felt tipped markers and/or an ink pad. You take a leaf--you’ll want a fairly malleable (not dried) one either color it (with the pens) or press it on the ink pad. Then stamp it onto paper. I used some dried Gingko leaves (strongly suggest if you have dried ones that you “re-hydrate” them) and markers and we had a blast! The fun thing with this one is that little kids and adults can do it. The results vary widely, but it’s fun for both.

Beads:
Something else I tried a couple years ago was making beads out of wood branches. I used willows, but I think any kind of tree would work. You snip the branches in whatever lengths you want your bead to be and then pound them through (lengthwise) with a nail about the girth of the hole you want. You can carve the bark if you want, I didn’t. I used a horse chestnut and some beads to make a present for a friend. I doubt she’ll ever wear it, but it was fun and she did like it.

If you know what you want to make, but don’t know how and don’t have anyone to ask then Google it. Chances are there’s someone on the web that will tell you how to make it.

Leave a Comment by April 14th (next week) for a chance to win a cool, creative, doable crafty gift from Chiska!

Easter Grass

Remember back on February 12th when I encouraged you to grow your own Easter grass? Now is the perfect time to start your grass so it will be ready on Easter (April 12th). Click here for the directions.

.............................

Now - a completely different topic. I have 2 tips for beautiful hair. They are pretty basic.

This is pretty much what I looked like before I cut my long hair.

1. Unless you have very oily or short hair, don't wash it everyday. Longer hair is like a silk shirt. Would you wash a silk shirt everytime you wore it? No, you wouldn't because the shirt would quickly begin to look old and worn. Same deal with your hair. So if your hair is longer skip a day or 2 (if you can stand it!) it is so much better for your hair and often I find that second day hair is much cuter than first day hair (and think of all the time you will save!).

2. When you shampoo, apply shampoo to your scalp and hair right next to the scalp. You don't need to shampoo the ends every time you shower, that just dries them out. The sudsy water rinsing through the ends of your hair is enough.

And BONUS! one more tip: use a leave-in conditioner every time.

That's all I got, baby.

How's that working for you?

by Kristen

I used to watch Dr. Phil and I always loved this question to his guests, "How's that working for you?" I like that question because it brings about a very important point... is what we are doing getting the results we want? It goes along with the saying, "If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got." So true!

When I was studying special education in college a professor was talking about using different types of discipline in the classroom, and whether they produce the desired effect. I loved the analogy he used. He said that if a child is misbehaving in class and you send them out to the hall, is that going to help eliminate the undesirable behavior? Well, it depends on how reinforcing it is out in the hall. If they can peek in other classrooms, goof off, draw, and visit with passers-by, then it probably will only increase the behavior that put them in the hall in the first place... the hall is more fun than the classroom.

In parenting we have to make these judgement calls all the time. Does putting your child in time-out stop the unpleasant behavior, or just temporarily give you a break? Does grounding your teenager due to low grades cause them to work harder to raise their grades, or does it just make them grouchy and unpleasant to be around, giving them the opportunity to stew in teenage angst (which seems to be rewarding to many teenagers). Does yelling, spanking, or ignoring your children's' arguments make them stop or just increase the intensity? Does buying them candy when they whine for it in the store make them more pleasant to shop with or does it simply teach them to whine louder, longer, and more often when they go shopping with you because they know there is a pay-off? (This applies to bedtime postponement behaviors as well).

Along with these tricky questions comes the whole "picking your battles" concept. I am a firm believer in this. NEVER tell your kid if they don't quit arguing you will cancel the birthday party, unless you REALLY WILL cancel the birthday party. That is a huge thing to follow through with. Instead, take a moment and decide what a realistic consequence is that you will actually follow through with.

Just last week I had to make some difficult decisions. I didn't ground my son (for poor grades), because I wasn't willing to put up with the moodiness, but I did threaten to take away his guitar (which induced a lesser degree of moodiness and a firm motivation to raise his grades), and I told him if he wasn't up in time for the bus, he would have to walk the 4 miles to school, because I would no longer bail him out. And I meant it. And he knew it. He started doing his homework and getting up on time. It comes down to yet another cliche "If you're going to talk the talk... you better be willing to walk the walk." It was a risk...if he didn't raise his grades, I would have to take his best friend away (guitar = best friend), if he didn't get up in time, I had to be willing to let him get a truancy for his 6th tardy because he had to walk to school. I almost didn't threaten that one, because... well, a truancy! But then again, he wasn't learning anything by sleeping in - maybe the truancy would teach him something more important.

What important lessons have you learned in your interactions with others, and yourself for that matter?

Art work by Norman Rockwell and Bill Watterson