Advice, Please: THE BOOB TUBE

by Emily

Calling advice and opinions from all women (do you think having "Boob" in my title will get us more google hits?):

I've read all the articles, I know all the reasons not to let children watch copious amounts of television. Second to not watching too much television, it is important to be selective in what you do choose to watch.

So I don't want to know why television isn't good, I don't need a lecture on that, I don't need links to articles and studies--I've read them. I get it. I agree. Some mothers might need that lecture--I have a feeling everyone who reads this blog DOES NOT need that lecture.

Freaky Teletubies Baby McSunHead

We totally watch television at our house. Each week we go to the library and check out books and 2 videos. Things like The Wiggles, Reading Rainbow, Barney, Dora, Backyardigans, and Beatrix Potter. Ruby LOVES to watch them.

We own: Baby Einstein, Elmo's World, Little Einsteins, HBO's Classical Baby Music and Dance, Beatrix Potter, Max and Ruby...and, (gasp!) I wish we owned more!

(Confessional Part II:) I let Ruby watch these videos almost every day--some days twice. That can be anywhere from 60 minutes to 120 minutes of television watching (sometimes more, but I'm in denial). I do try to not let this happen all in a row. And usually Joey is napping during much of this time.

Oh, we'll keep playing them, believe me, we'll keep playing them.

Here's the thing--Joe is a full time PhD student, and I am also taking a very intensive graduate English class. I rely on the videos to give me some time to get my homework done. It is uninterrupted time--so that I can maintain a steady stream of thought and concentration. (Can anyone say mush for brains?)

But even having said that--we have always relied on videos. When you have a new baby, you can strap that baby securely in a swing or highchair or exersaucer, pop in a video, and catch up on some zzzz's. Sometimes I'm paranoid and I nap on the couch in the same room. Sometimes I feel more confident and I slip into the room nearby and lay on the bed. It is called COPING. It is called grasping at anything to keep my sanity.



Ruby's early cultivation of love for television

What is your own philosophy on television watching?
How do you work it?

No TV?
Tivo?
Time limits?
TV in your child's bedroom?
Lighten up?
Tight controls?
Guilt attacks?
Anxiety over irreversible damage?

I want to hear some opinions, dang it! State your case and don't apologize for it!

Favorites of the week

by Sally

My favorite things this week.

First on my list has to be the public library. At my library, once you have a card, you can go online and reserve anything in the entire library system. They will send it to the local library as soon as it's available, email me that it's waiting, and my local library then holds the item for me for 2 weeks.

Right now at home I have this book on CD:

Haven't listened to it yet and it's due tomorrow. The road to late fees is paved with good intentions.

These DVDs:

And quite a few children's books with CDs so the kids can listen and read along.

On hold and waiting for me at this very moment are a bunch of Christmas CDs, a cookbook, and the newest (it's not that new) Khaled Hosseini book on CD. While there is a limit to how many items you can check out, there is no limit to how many you can place on hold. I have over 40 items on hold at the moment! One of them is a parenting book one of my bossy sisters told me to read. Another is Twilight, the book everyone on the planet has read except for me. Because it is so popular it might take me, say, 2-3 weeks to get it, instead of 5 days which is often the norm for things on my holds list.

When I pick this up later today, I will put it on immediately. I'm not waiting until after Thanksgiving for Christmas music this year.

I used to buy books at Costco. I still have a huge stack of them that I've not yet read. Now I check books out for FREE and don't read them. Much better!

Today I got on a roll and added a bunch of music CDs. Mostly new age stuff--Liz Story, George Winston. Also some John Williams and Yo-Yo Ma, Ella Fitzgerald, and of course The Muppets. I get to audition all of these CDs for a week or two before deciding if I want to buy them on itunes. You can also check out movies, kid's music, any printed media, and some library systems even have amazing online resources like the Rosetta Stone language courses.

Just a small portion of my holds list.

If you don't use your library, give it a try. Most libraries have these online resources now and they are fantastic and will save you money. (Unless you are disorganized like me and you end up paying lots of small late fees...still worth it). You can't beat it for finding books on CDs for road trips (or cleaning the house), cookbooks, parenting books, and a zillion things to entertain and educate children.

Other favorite things this week:

The shark, which my kids think is an awesome toy and therefore they use it constantly. It was about $50 at Coscto. It does not have suction, but the tiny motor does sweep stuff up. I was actually underwhelmed by the performance of this purchase, but in the 3 weeks since, it's gotten used multiple times every day by les enfants, so I have to love that.




Bamboo cooking utensils. From Target. Bamboo is a very durable wood, but gentle on your cookware. You will never go back to plastic or (gasp) metal again.



Man. I spent a long time trying to find the image of these bamboo utensils, then finally gave up and took my own photo. This picture shows that 1. they are Chefmate brand (3 pack at Target includes slotted spoot and reg spoon too) and 2. I have two of the same utensil because I like them so much, I went back 6 months later and got another set.


Cold Weather. We moved recently and I wasn't expecting the warm weather to be humid for the first 5 hours of every single morning! Getting sweaty while dropping kids off for school is not fun. It was too hot for 4 months straight (no one here has A/C). I am so grateful to finally have some cool weather and have the house get cold at night.

This weather looks very appealing when you are too hot for 4 months.

And those, gentle readers, are my favorites of the week.

The Bossy Sister Interview

Julie is someone you want to know. She is someone you want to be friends with. She is always doing something exciting and new: moving to Iceland, taking classes towards a culinary degree, running off to Paris to shop the flea markets, going to auctions, throwing parties. She is a super mom – not afraid of anyone, especially her four kids! And, she knows more about potatoes than anyone.

She is married to the freakishly genius Steve who can teach physics at the Air Force Academy, or be a NATO analyst overseas. They like to canoe, read, camp, raise their smart beautiful children, and Julie acts like she doesn’t spend much money and Steve acts like he doesn’t notice. It works.

Oh, I forgot to mention, Julie is a little bit bossy. That’s why I love her.

The Bossy Sisters interview Julie:

Bossy: Last year you moved to Stavanger, Norway. Most women would freak out about that but you seemed excited to go. What is it like to live in Stavanger?

Julie has a view of the Ocean from her house. This was taken on a 5 minute walk from her home.

Stavanger is incredibly green and beautiful. It has water almost everywhere you turn. Stavanger is on the south-west coast of Norway so there is the ocean and then the fjords and just a little farther inland are lots of freshwater lakes and rivers. They have big modern grocery stores, a quaint downtown area, lots of thrift stores for me to shop, and very friendly people who are happy to speak English to me (unlike France). There is rolling farmland and mountains close by. I love languages so I love the challenge of learning Norwegian.

Carrots, $2 a bunch

My goal right now is to check out at the grocery store without them knowing I only speak English. I can answer all the grocery store checkout questions now like, 'how many bags do you want?' (We have to buy our plastic bags separately), 'do you have a saver card?', 'do you want your receipt?', and then I can say 'thank you, goodbye'. If they ask me anything else I just stare blankly and then stutter 'sorry, do you speak English?' Then they switch on a dime and say 'of course', with no accent at all which makes me feel like a stupid American who doesn't speak anything BUT English!

My idea of “the Military Wife” (taken mostly from made-for-TV-movies) was completely different than the military wives I have known. In what ways is it different to be a Military Wife(compared to someone who isn’t married to a military man)?

I am probably not the typical military wife because Steve is not a soldier but a scientist. It makes it easier because we don't move quite as often. You do have to have a good attitude about moving however and learn to make friends quickly, wherever you are because either they will move or you will. There are different military wife philosophies on moving. Some don't unpack boxes very quickly or decorate their house because 'they are moving again in 2-3 years' and 'I will decorate our retirement home'. My take is that we will be here for 2-3 YEARS! That's a long time in my life and my children's life and I'm going to do everything I can to make our home a home for that time. If people wait 20 years to decorate a house they won't have any idea what to do and all their pictures of their old houses will be stupid to boot! I also love cleaning out everything and de-junking before every move. People who live in one spot for a long time have too much junk that they never even realize they have.

Let’s talk Polish Pottery. How many patterns of Polish Pottery do you have?
3 or 4..maybe 6 or 7 if you count the odds and ends pieces that I don't have many of.

How many pieces of Polish Pottery do you have?
If you count every plate (which I'm not doing), and count what's in my dad's barn in boxes until we move back (also not doing), hundreds I guess.

What is your favorite piece? A chicken pancake cover I'm also drawn to small pitchers. They are great for hot syrup, gravy, and salad dressing. I don't have enough.

Did you buy it all in Poland?
I bought a few pieces in Iceland before my first trip to Poland, and a few at TJ Maxx but most in Poland. It's WAY cheaper!

How many trips have you made to Poland?
4

Will you be buying more?
Of course! I'm trying to plan a trip for in the Spring when I can drive my van! Although the prices get higher every time I go.

If we all come to visit you, will you take us to Poland?
Definitely. Just tell me when and what airport to pick you up at!

Your home is beautifully decorated. You told me that you usually have the household up and running, decorated, with fresh homemade bread within 2 weeks of moving in. How do you do that?

My mind never turns off and I don't sleep much until it's done. I stay up late and get up early. Before we even move in, I have an idea of where I want things to go initially. I really don't feel like we are up and running until I have all the boxes gone. Usually 2 weeks for the big stuff and a month tops for some little tweaks. Then I start painting or making curtains, moving stuff around, buying stuff to fill in the holes, etc. Really, decorating my house is my biggest hobby so I just love doing it!

Please give those of us who are decorating-challenged a few suggestions on things we can do to make our home lovely. What are your tricks?

Julie just painted and finished this shelf.

• Realize that white is not a 'color' in your room and 15 shades of beige is just not exciting!
• Declutter and group your collections in a few spots.
• Look at lots of magazines and copy what you like.
• All shelves should have a plant, books, clock or plate, and maybe some other fun piece.

You were living in Iceland on 9/11. Tell us what that was like. What did you do that day?

We arrived in Iceland on Sept. 1, 2001. In the afternoon on the 11th (5 hours ahead of the east coast) my neighbor came running over and told me what happened. We went to her house to watch the tv footage. We got American TV on the base there. The base went to lock down (nobody could come in or out and the guys had to stay at work). They bussed the kids home from the base school and then went to quarters lock down which meant we couldn't leave our apartments. They closed school for 3 days and Steve was at work for the duration. I spent that time making food and homemade bread for the guys that worked for Steve and watching the tv we borrowed. We were probably in the safest spot on earth but it was still scary. Especially since we were new to the country and overseas life.

2001 Iceland

You are an amazing cook. You have every nifty gadget available. You went to culinary school. Please share a recipe with us that we can make for Thanksgiving/Christmas that will impress the in-laws.

I really just make the same stuff over and over. A definite benefit of moving around, you get to steal the best recipes from your friends :) I love these at Christmas time.

Cookie jar Ginger Snaps

2c. flour
1Tbl. ground ginger
2tsp. baking soda
1tsp. cinnamon
1/2 tsp. salt
3/4 c. Crisco
1c. sugar
1 egg
1/4c. molasses

Sift together dry ingredients. (I never do that). In a mixer, beat Crisco and sugar for 2 min. add egg. add molasses and mix until combined. Add dry ingredients in two batches. Roll dough into small balls and roll in sugar. Place 2 inces apart on ungreased cookie sheet and bake @ 350 for 12-15 min. DO NOT OVERBAKE or they won't be chewy and yummy!

You have a beautiful collection of books by Kathleen Norris. What is the name of the last book you loved?
I love to read as an escape. Therefore I don't usually read heavy intellectually challenging books (Unlike Steve who reads math and physics text books for fun). I love the easy read. I love my Kathleen Norris books. They were written in the 1920's and '30s and are the cleanest romances you will every read. And soooooo romantic. I liked the Twilight series. I love the catering-murder mysteries of Diane Mott Davidson as well. I read lots of things my children do. I'm in line (after Steve and the boys) to read Brisingr.

So many women don’t do fun things. They get caught up in cleaning and working. But you always seem to be doing something fun, going to lunch, having a party, inviting people over for dinner, traveling, hanging out with friends. Why do you make that happen in your life?

I am social. I have to be doing things. My house isn't always spotless and my laundry is rarely done and I have a sock basket the size of Texas but I love being with people and my life would be boring without all my friends and family!

You have traveled the world, seen it all, Steve retires in a few years. What are your plans after he retires?
We are planning for Steve to work with my dad and manage my family's farm so my dad can retire. We'll grow wheat, potatoes, and sweet corn and live in Moses Lake, Washington where I grew up. It's a great little town and I love the farmland and surrounding areas. I love the green wheat in the spring and the golden wheat in the fall, I love the smell of freshly dug potatoes, and I love canning sweet corn that came from dad's fields. It will be great. I'm sure I'll get the travel-bug but I can travel from there just as well as from here. It will just take longer!

Julie's Blog, Norge Notes, is private. If you would like to be invited to her blog (where she blogs about life in Norway, decoration, recipes, and the goofy antics of her family) just email us here at, bossysisters at gmail dot com, be sure to include your name. She said if we will vouch for you she will invite you! (We'll vouch for ANYONE who reads our blog!)

Christmas coins

by Melissa

This past week. I was making a schedule for a little Play-School I'm doing for my 3 year old and her friends and I realized Christmas is only about 8 weeks away. Yikes! Then, I got thinking about the past few Decembers, and here comes the true confessions-- I clearly remember thinking, "I'll think of thoughtful gifts next year, this year I just need to BUY SOMETHING." "Next year I am going to teach my kids about Giving." "I'll take time to feel the 'spirit' of the Season after Christmas" Yes, I actually thought this-- lets just get the 25th over and then I'll relax and feel all Christmassy.... um, delusional? Maybe. (I was actually called delusional yesterday. I'm clinging to it, it makes me feel better about things.)

Switch Gears.

My friend Becky gives her kids Mom Bucks for all sorts of things... extra chores, good behavior, that kind of thing. (She also has the power to take them away--- oooh, Power!) Her kids use them to buy special treats... She told me about this and I thought it was terrific, but I was too lazy to implement it. This happens to me a lot. A lot. I hear great ideas that make for responsible kids and happy families and I am too lazy to do the set up... But not this time. This time, I decided to spin it my way.

Enter Christmas Coins:

Each child created a jar. Ugly as Sin, but they needed some ownership here, I was picturing all PBK cutesy I got 4th grade boy draws aliens... whatever, he feels invested. That was the point. Each Darling Child gets Poker chips aka Christmas Coins for all sorts of reasons-- Jobs well done, done without nagging, Kindness to others... you get the idea. The Coins earned go towards buying gifts for each other! (Maybe this year I'll teach the joy of giving?)

I hope it works. Yesterday, after Henry had eaten 3 markers from off the dining room/Art Central floor, I threatened to dump all the previously earned coins... not so well played by me. I'll try for better today. They are motivated to earn and give, and so am I. I am hoping in starting this "giving" theme early I will have a more with-it Christmas Season.

Book Review: Waiting for Birdy

By Emily

I wonder if Sally will feel like I stole this Book Review from her? She's so bossy, she gave me this book and then ordered me to read it, and because I need an occasional bossing from a sister (get some sleep! buy yourself those cute earings! come visit me NOW!), I, of course, read it. And it.was.perfect.

I was in my second pregnancy, Ruby was just 3. I was mostly tired, and frustrated by my short fuse. There were a lot of timeouts, and a lot of mommy apologizing. And then, in the few quiet moments of the day, the self-introspection (read: self-deprecation). Is this what it will be like? Will I always feel annoyed by 3 year old things that I'm supposed to enjoy? Will she hate the baby? Will I love the baby? How can I love anyone as much as I love Ruby? But here's Catherine Newman*. She gets it. In talking to Sally--who was just a few months ahead of me in pregnancy--we decided, it was as if Catherine Newman* read our minds and our hearts, and had the audacity to write it down for the world to read. How dare she!

I keep thinking of this book. Today at the park with another expecting mother--she's expecting her second baby--it snuck into our conversation 5 times. By the end she was saying, "Okay, I guess I will have to check out that book!" ("leave me alone, Crazy McNutFace!") Honestly, I try not to be pushy--but when a bossing goes so well from one sister to another, you sort of have this urge to share it with everyone else.

Here was the scene: three mothers, two young children each, except for one who is expecting her second--conversation: babies, motherhood. There is something so special about that second child. You've already adjusted to being a mother--that huge adjustment is over. You know now what it is like to love a child, you know better than ever before what is at stake. Does that feeling ever go away? This time, this time you know.

But then there is this daily drudgery of wiping, picking up, wiping, picking up. With this pregnancy, you don't have time to do that whole "bonding" thing like the first pregnancy. Oh, My First Pregnancy. For each first pregnancy should be a First Pregnancy. Ruby and I had intimate conversations all the time, mostly in my head, or when no one was around. Every night Joe would talk to her in my stomach, singing JT's Close Your Eyes. That just didn't happen with Maximus, we were complete strangers sharing the same space, giving me heartburn. I just didn't feel connected, because I just didn't have time.



Then, it's time. You're in labor, that baby is coming and all the newborn clothes are in piles on the laundry room floor and you're not ready--and believe me, you're not ready, but you never will be because when that baby comes, you think your heart is going to explode--because this, this, is even more powerful than you remember. This time, you are there. Present. In the moment. And it happens in an instant--no longer strangers, love coming so strong and so fast--different than the first time. This baby, this beautiful baby, this second child is all of the good and none of the bad, and you thought you knew what to expect, but you didn't have a clue.

And I still love Ruby, more than ever.





*these are my favorite posts of Catherine Newman's, but she is no longer posting here.
Do you think she'd consider being my friend? I bet she has a Bossy streak in her.

Pumpkin Head

by Sally

Not to get all Martha on you or anything, but I recently made a pumpkin pie from a real pumpkin. This was thanks to my oldest child, who asked repeatedly until I realized, why not?

The good news is, it tastes delicious. Lighter and fresher than regular pumpkin pie. Other good news is that I feel virtuous for having made it, and yet more good news: it's from a vegetable so it must be health food. The not-so-good news: it's more work than canned pumpkin. Big surprise there.

So, in case you should ever have a desire to do this yourself, here are the gory details.

First, get a pie pumpkin. I got mine at trader joe's. They are cute.

Lip balm is here to show scale. Pie pumpkins are smallish.

Next, set your frozen pie crust on the counter to thaw (not very Martha). If you plan ahead, you can thaw it in the fridge overnight and then on the counter. It needs to be room temp. Or you can be an overachiever and make your own, it's not hard, just one more thing to do. Either way, get your crust prepped (do not bake it in advance, it bakes with the pie).

Pie crust also courtesy of Trader Joe's.

Wash the outside of the pumpkin and cut in half. Scoop out the seeds and gunky stuff (this was the hardest part, and anyone helping you will probably quit to go watch Mary Poppins, or at least that's what happened at my house).

In half. Don't mess with the stem part. You can save the seeds to roast, if you're into that kind of thing.

Clean as a whistle.

When your pumpkin is clean, cook it in the microwave. I put mine in a large glass dish with about an inch of water and covered with saran wrap. Microwave on high for 12 min, then keep cooking, but poke it with a fork every 2 minutes until it is soft all the way through to the peel.

The peel will stay hard and should be easy to pull off. Let your pumpkin cool before you try this or you'll have some burned fingers. Use that cooling time to turn the oven on to 425 F, drink a diet coke, and put your pie crust into a 9-inch pie pan. Don't forget to make the edges pretty!

The pumpkin after cooking, with the skin peeling off.

Scoop out (or peel away) the soft pumpkin into a mixing bowl. If you have a hand blender, use it to puree the pumpkin until it is totally smooth. This took about 2-3 minutes for me. You could also use a regular blender, a cuisinart or even a hand mixer. It should be very smooth (like baby food) after blending. Don't add any water to help puree it. After it's pureed, let it sit for 5 minutes and pour off any water that may be sitting on top (there may not be any).

You now have homemade pumpkin glop that qualifies your pie as health food! (If you are planning to bake this pie on a busy day, I suggest that you do all of work up to this point in advance of the day you want to bake the pie, and refrigerate the glop.)

Add to the mixing bowl the following ingredients:

1 cup sugar
1.5 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon ground cloves
1 teaspoon ground allspice
1.5 teaspoon ground ginger
(or, if you have pre-mixed pumpkin pie spice, just add 3.5 teaspoons)
one half teaspoon salt
4 large eggs
3 cups pumpkin glop (I actually only had 2.5 cups)
1 can (12oz ) of evaporated milk

I like how the little spice container looks like an open beak. "Give me some pie"! I'm crazy.

Mix well using a hand blender or mixer. It will be very runny and you may be thinking "this is not going to work". It will. Pour into your pie crust until about 1/2 inch from the top of the crust. You are ready to bake! If you have lots of leftover pie filling (I did) you can either make little tartlets using pie crust and a muffin tin, or just grease a baking dish of a size that the extra filling will fill to a depth of about 2 inches. Bake this with the pie for a "crustless" pumpkin pie. For your kids.

Bake at 425 F for the first 15 minutes, then at 350 F for another 45-60 minutes. Your house will smell good. Children and husbands will come out of the woodwork. You can test it's doneness by inserting a regular table knife into the center. It should come out with a few little goobers on it, but not coated with pie filling.

That gash is my knife mark. Maybe I was a little too assertive.

Let your beautiful masterpiece of a pie cool. Chase away children and husbands who want to eat it prematurely.

It is good with ice cream, whipped cream, or plain. This pie is perfectly acceptable to eat at any meal, including breakfast. It has vegetable and protein in it. It's health food! Enjoy!

By Popular Demand!

I have been begged, so here is the list.

This isn’t a complete list – but it is pretty close. These are books read by The Page Turners book club. I really enjoyed most of these books. Many of them are books I wouldn’t have read without the book club. I have starred * the ones that I love. The * are books that I loved so much I feel like they became a part of me.

I am sure you will find lots of your favorite books in this list.

1992-96

My Sister the Moon - Sue Harrison
Thief of Time- Tony Hillerman
*Man’s Search for Meaning - Victor Frankel
Bridges of Madison County – This one caused a fight
Everything I Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten - Snoozer
How Green Was My Valley – Richard Llewellyn
Joy Luck Club – Amy Tan
Having Our Say – the Delany Sisters
Catcher in the Rye – Jo Salinger
The Bean Tree – Barbara Kingsolver
*The Hiding Place – Corrie Ten Boom
The Shell Seekers – Rosemunde Pilcher
Where are the children? Mary Higgins Clark
Cold Sassy Tree – Olive Ann Burns
The Giver – Lois Lowry
The Great Train Robbery – Michael Crichton
Daisy Fay and the Miracle Man
*Tisha- Robert Specht
Harry Potter - we read this way before it became popular – we were cutting edge.
*Prodigal Summer – Barbara Kingsolver
Two From Galilee – Marjory Holms
*Like Water for Chocolate – Laura Esquence

1997
Not to Worry Mom, I’m Okay – Karma Smith Belnap
A Long Fatal Chase – Lousia May Alcott
Simeon Solution – Ann Osborne Poleman
Piano Lessons – Noah Adams
My Antonia – Willa Cather
*Crossing to Safety – Wallace Stagner

1998 - 1999
Into Thin Air – Jon Krakauer
Reviving Ophelia – Mary Pipher
Saints – Orson Scott Card – This one caused a heated discussion.
The Chatham School Affair – Thomas Cook
Seven Habits for Effective Families – Stephan Covey
*Christy – Catherine Marshall
Evita, The Real Life of – Nicolas Fraser and Marysa Navarro
*Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood- Rebecca Wells
Cold Mountian – Charles Frazer
A Tree Grows in Brooklyn – Betty Smith
*Glimpses – Marjorie Pay Hinckley
The Richest Man in Babylon

2000-2003
*Agony & Ecstasy – James A Mitchner
Snow Falling on Cedars – Gutterson
A Walk in the Woods – Bill Bryson
The Ginger Tree – Osward Wynd
Living a Life that Matters – Harold Kushner
Sarah – Orson Scott Card
A Farewell to Arms – Ernest Hemmingway
Kane & Able – Jeffery Archer
*Ladies Auxiliary – Tova Mirvis
*These is my Words – Nancy E Turner
One Thousand White Women
A Breach of Promise- Ann Perry
Girl with a Pearl Earring – Tracy Chevalier
Sea Glass – Anita Shreve
Finding Fish – Antwone Fisher
Wishing Well – David Balducci
Uncle Tom’s Cabin – Harriet Beacher Stowe
Secret Life of Bees – Sue Mark Kidd

2004
The Da Vinci Code – Dan Brown
*Bel Canto – Ann Patchette
*Peace Like A River – Leif Enger
Life of Pi – Yaan Martel
Screwtape Letters – C.S. Lewis
Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands – Dr. Laura

2005
*The Good Earth – Pearl S. Buck
Reading Lotlita in Tehran – Azar Nafisi
Cane River – Lalita Tademy
French Women Don’t Get Fat – Mireille Guiliano
Sacagawea – Anna L Waldo
Churchhill’s Secret Agent – Josephine Butler
My Name is Asher Lev – Chaim Potok

2006
Kite Runner
Gifted Hands

At this point I moved to Colorado. Away from the best book club ever. Waa.

Have More Fun!

Start a Book Club

By Robin

I'm gonna boss you and tell you what you need to do: start a book club.

Fifteen years ago I found myself with 3 little kids and a brain that felt like it was turning to mush. So I started a book club. Over the years I have belonged to several book clubs including a few at church, a neighborhood club, and one made strictly of friends with similar interests. Some have been better than others.

Benefits of Book Club:

• Meet interesting people, some of whom turn into lifelong friends
• Exposure to books you might not choose for yourself
• Stimulating discussions
• Yummy refreshments (usually)
• Feel brainy as you learn about people, lifestyles, cultures, history, and so on
• A chance to dress cute and put on lipstick

What Makes a Good Book Club:

• Consistency – make sure it happens regularly (once a month, quarterly, whatever works)
• Interesting books
• Lively (but emotionally safe) discussions
• Good food

What Makes a Great Book Club:

• Members take turns choosing and reviewing books
• Members commit to read the book each month
• Reviews that are well prepared with background information on the author, style of writing, social/political impact of the book and discussion questions that are slightly aggressive
• Members leave book club meeting with next month’s book in their hand
• Rotate hosting the club meetings at member’s homes or restaurants/coffee houses (host pays for drinks and appetizers)
• People who express their opinions tactfully in a win/win way

Above and Beyond Book Club:

• Theme for the monthly meeting matching theme for book, including the menu (I recently did this for “The Ladies Auxiliary” by Tova Mirvis, and made a kosher meal. It didn’t taste very good, mostly my fault, but hey, we found out what matzo balls, gefilte fish, and kugel tastes like).
• Dues each month go towards parties, community service, literary projects

Simple Steps to Start Your Book Club:

• Invite people who like to read – about 12 people - that way you will have about 8 at each meeting. I actually called 3 of my best friends who love to read and asked them to each invite 3 people.
  
• Have an initial meeting and take charge. Be the leader for the year. Lay down the rules as you want them.
• Suggested rules:
• Members rotate hosting, book recommendation and book review responsibilities
• Books are chosen, paid for, and ordered 2 months in advance so they can be delivered the next meeting.
• Members commit to read each month’s selection
• The person who recommends the book, reviews the book
• The person who hosts does not review the book that month
• Start your club!

Some clubs choose a theme for each year: children’s lit, Civil War novels, poetry, and so on. Some clubs have Mother/Daughter month in June (held at a tea house with fancy sandwiches) and Husband/Wife month in February (held at a sports/cowboy bar) choosing books that are appropriate for the audience. When we did the Husband/Wife we read “Into Thin Air” and had a lively discussion that ended up being a planning meeting for a hike up Mount Borah.

I have been in some great discussions. The worst book club discussion, or best depending on your point of view, was about “Bridges of Madison County”. Oh! Women who had perfect husbands were horrified at the infidelity. Women who’s husbands were lacking loved the book. At first, people gently tried to convince each other of the great/horrible qualities of the book. One woman (perfect husband) got preachy and pushy. A big fight ensued, complete with tears and threats to drop out of the club, but no one dropped out of the group. The preachy woman eventually moved, to our great relief!

My first book club, 15 years ago, is still my favorite. We were going through the same things and often our reviews would turn into deep discussions about children, marriage, sex, mean neighbors, in-laws, trials we were experiencing. I would leave book club each month feeling smarter, emotionally and spiritually lifted, and sure that I was the luckiest girl to have so many awesome friends.

So, have more fun in your life! Start a book club!

Vote!

The conversation I had with my 12 year old today in the car was interesting. He said, "All of my friends are saying this is the most important election ever." First of all, I was surprised that his friends are discussing politics in any sense at all. He is primarily schooled through an online, virtual academy and I haven't seen any political stuff coming through that, so it was just a little intriguing to me. We discussed this election and whether or not it is truly "the most important ever". My opinion is that it is not. I believe that it is a critical election, a historical election, and only time will tell whether or not it will deserve the title of the most important election ever.

To witness and participate in the selection of a new "landmark" presidential duo is amazing. This year we will either elect a black man, or a white woman, to serve in roles that have been held by white men since 1789. This makes this election a powerful statement within our own nation.

My father-in-law, 2 brothers-in-law, and 3 nephews have all served in the armed forces to protect the freedoms we so enjoy. One of my nephews was almost killed on several occasions, he saved many of his comrades' lives, and earned the bronze star for Valor, for his service. One of those freedoms he worked so hard to protect is the right to vote. Whether or not you feel your vote matters, whether or not you "love" the candidate who most closely represents your ideals (and there may not be one that comes as close as you wish), whether or not you are "cancelling out" your friend's, spouse's, or sibling's vote; go to the polls and vote. Be a part of this nation, be active, be a participant and vote. You will feel good about it. You will be doing your part. You will be making your voice heard.

And a nice little bonus is that you can get the little sticker that reads, "I Voted". I love that sticker, I wear it all day long with pride. Vote, you know you want to.

Mid-Day Connection

When my oldest went off to first grade I cried. Cried! I couldn't imagine going from 8:30 in the morning till 4:15 pm without talking to him. What would he be thinking about? Who would he sit by? What if his zipper stuck? What if, what if, what if! I didn't let him see me weep, in fact, I was stoic--no, no I was cheerful! It was a great thing to go to school-- I knew, I had done it myself! I had been a student, it was fun! I had been a teacher, it was fun! He was going to love it.

Inside I was sobbing.

Then, I remembered lunch. Oh great, who was going to open his juice box for him? More worries... no wait, a note! It all came to me! A note. That was the ticket to all my woes. I could send him a love note everyday. It was like we were talking in the middle of the day, a bit one sided, but better than nothing.

I have since sent 2 more children off for the first day at school, lunch box in hand... note included. Some times the note is an ode to the child. A list of wonderful attributes, sometimes a reminder to bring home the trombone or to wipe the Oreo's off their lips before going back to class. Sometimes I make a poem from their name, a countdown till a major event or send a silly joke. One day I sent in a note, a testimony of what I believe and that I know they are remarkable kids. I figure I spend about 2 minutes a day... It isn't much, but it makes me smile and I feel a bit more connected while they are gone.

A month after my daughter started all day kindergarten this fall, I asked her what she liked most about school. She has lots of new friends, library, PE, Music, Art class, Choice Time, Centers, Calendar, new crayons a bus ride.... Her answer was simple and quick. "The note in my lunch."

I guess I'll keep at it.

P.S. Just in case you've enjoyed a peaceful Sunday without needing to be somewhere at a certain time (Lovely day!) Don't forget the change to Daylight Savings Time. Don't ask me which way we go. I just know we fall. However, I've tried for 34 years to remember whether we fall back ( landing on my big badooba) or Fall Forward (tripping and landing on my knees.) I fall so often, forward and back (Just call me Grace) I get this all confused. Hope you aren't late .... er... early, for wherever you need to be.